"You would think that for a creature that dwells solely on the light of his computer that he wouldn't be an outdoorsy type." -Sean S.
"Aye I entered his lair once. A horrid abomination it was. The odors insulted the angels to the High Heavens but worst of all, his music was enough to make my own ears bleed." -Jordan F.
How to Find Him
There
is some few distinctive trademarks of
Christimious Kalanzopian that allow us
legend seekers to track him. The first one that
is the most notable, is his done companion. The
very loud mechanical bird is bonded to him in
some fashion. Where ever he goes, it follows
him. If you were to spot the drone and manage to
chase it back to him, odds are is that he knows
you are on his trail. Which brings to the next
identifiers. If you see discarded mini golf
passes, he was near by. If you see a basketball
in the area, he was near by, If you see some
expensive beverage container, he was near by.
Ultimately, he has known to vanish and show up
at EDM concerts from time to time. Christa
Kanztaponople, is drawn to this style of
music so luring him out with it is someone's
best chance at seeing him. There is
also empirical data that shows that he MUST be
near a power source at all times. If whatever he
has isn't charged, well there is no telling what
he is capable of.
If ALL of these are checked off, HE'S NEAR YOU!
Please call your local scienstist.
EDM
Drone
Trash
Power Outlet